How to Be a Good Co-worker
Be intentional about building connections with your co-workers.
Be intentional about building connections with your co-workers.
You may be intentional and thoughtful in your relationships with your friends, but your relationships with your co-workers are equally as important. After all, most people spend a large portion of their day with their co-workers. According to Shilagh A. Mirgain, Ph.D., a psychologist from the UW School of Medicine and Public Health, our happiness is affected by the people around us. In turn, you have the power to affect your co-workers’ happiness.
Here, we’ll discuss why it’s important to be a good co-worker and we’ll dive into the do’s and don’ts to forming and maintaining positive relationships with your co-workers.
What to do
With so much of your time spent at work, a positive interaction with a co-worker has the power to change the tone of the entire day for both you and them. Having strong and healthy relationships with your co-workers can help make that a reality. According to Greater Good Magazine, a publication from the University of California, Berkeley, “social connection is the single biggest driver of our happiness and one of the biggest drivers of our engagement and productivity at work.” Fostering these strong connections by being kind, courteous and respectful helps everybody be happier.
To be a good co-worker, prioritize intentionality by looking for moments to connect with your co-workers. Offer to help them finish up a big project, compliment the new picture on their desk or ask them about the movie they saw over the weekend.
Aim to build camaraderie by actively seeking things you have in common. In an article for Forbes, Kate Dixon, founder of workplace consulting firm Dixon Consulting, said, “When you can find the things you already share, it's easy to build on them.”
What not to do
When tensions run high in the workplace, try to not let problems, resentment or animosity build. Just as positive interactions can affect the entire day, so can negative ones. Resentment can build for years, so it’s best to address it as soon as possible.
To accomplish this, Dana Manciagli, president and founder of Job Search Master Class, the nation’s leading online job search workshop, said, “Put the strain on the table without accusations or blame. Listen. Then propose solutions such as going to a long lunch to talk about it or getting a facilitator to help improve the work relationship, then ask what ideas they have.” If all else fails, management or human resources can help, but try not to let problems brew under the surface.
Additionally, it’s best to avoid work romances. In fact, many work policies forbid it. Trying to pursue a romantic relationship with a co-worker can make them feel uncomfortable at best. At worst, it can straddle and even cross the line into sexual harassment, which should always be taken seriously. Know your company’s rules, consider the worst-case scenario, and make it safe for the other person to say “no.”
What to say
If you have something positive to say to a co-worker, say it. Sometimes we think it’s not worth it to reach out to a co-worker, but "kind and helpful communication" can make their day.
When your co-worker does something that’s worth recognition, let them know. Saying something like, “You really saved me in that presentation yesterday. Thank you,” can go a long way.
If a new co-worker starts, offer to show them around or grab lunch together. Consider something like, “It’s so nice to see a new face on the team. Do you have any plans for lunch today?”
Remember to keep your conversations short to not waste your co-worker’s time. Whether it’s during work or after you clock out, try to be respectful of their time.
Summary
To be a good co-worker, be intentional with your words and actions, and remember these tips:
— Be kind, courteous and respectful.
— Be intentional in connecting with your co-workers.
— Seek common interests.
— Don’t let problems brew under the surface.
— Avoid workplace romances.
— Say positive things to your co-workers.