How to Help a Loved One Seek Mental Health Support
Talking to someone struggling with their mental health isn’t always easy, but you can help your friend get the best support for them.
Help your friend get the best support for them.
Renee Harleston
Reviewer URLIt can be difficult when a friend is struggling with a mental health issue. While talking about mental health has become more common, your friend might feel uncomfortable or embarrassed sharing their struggles. Here, you’ll learn how to talk to someone who needs mental health support. We’ll also cover what to do to avoid causing further difficulty for your friend.
The root of the situation
There’s a chance your friend may not have told anyone else about what they’re going through currently. Research from the National Institute of Mental Health shows men are less likely to get help for mental health concerns than women. And people with mental health conditions continue to face discrimination in healthcare, employment and even their ability to buy a home, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).
If your friend does open up, you’re in a special position to direct them to seek help. A 2017 study from the journal Electron Physician shows just being there for your friend can reduce their anxiety and help them feel secure.
According to MentalHealth.gov, signs your loved one is struggling may include:
— Difficulty carrying out daily tasks like getting to work on time or completing schoolwork
— Losing their temper more often
— Making comments such as, “Nothing matters anymore.”
— Sleeping too little or too much
Sometimes, the most helpful thing you can do is guide them towards the sort of professional help that will best serve their unique needs.
What to do
Having these difficult conversations might help if you come to the conversation prepared. NAMI provides family and friends with resources for mental health. You can also try the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for educational support and tips on helping someone with a mental health concern, especially if your loved one is also struggling with substance use.
Your loved one’s physical safety is critical. If your loved one is experiencing an emotional crisis or thoughts of suicide, there are many options available for you to offer your help.
— If you are comfortable calling the police, you may call 911. NAMI provides helpful tips if you have to call 911.
— For more direct help, dial 988, the new national emergency number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.
— If possible, you may also help them get to their nearest emergency department.
— Text the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741. Help is provided 24/7 via text message.
— Try state-specific crisis resources that are alternatives to emergency services. Check if your city or state participates.
If they’re not in immediate danger, you can help by ensuring you’re in a good place to talk, like a quiet environment where no one else is around who may hear. Listen to your friend and try to refrain from providing any advice until you hear about their situation.
What not to do
When it comes to talking with someone about mental health struggles, there isn’t a right or wrong way. However, there are some factors to keep in mind when offering support. Your friend may not be ready to seek professional mental health support. Avoid prying or pressing them to talk if they aren’t comfortable sharing everything.
Don’t assume you know what they need or what they’re going through. This also includes not interrupting or sharing your own struggles. You might miss something important your friend is trying to share if you focus too much on yourself. Hold off on advice unless they ask for it.
What to say
Start by thanking them for trusting you with something personal. Use “I” statements, instead of “you.” For example, you can say, “I understand things might be really hard for you right now.” Ask them questions such as, “Have you thought about seeing a therapist?”
Let your loved one know you’re there for them if they need to talk. Validate their experiences without judgment. Thank them for letting you know about their struggles and that they’re not alone.
If they ask you for advice, share any resources such as recommendations for a therapist. You can point them to the National Register to find a local therapist, or encourage them to talk with their healthcare provider.
Summary
For some of us, our first instinct is to provide advice whenever a friend or loved one has a problem. While advice may be helpful, it isn’t always wanted. Finding ways to be supportive such as giving them your undivided attention is more valuable for people dealing with personal conflicts.
To recap, when helping someone get the right mental health support:
— Prepare in advance.
— Ensure they’re safe.
— Listen to them.
— Use “I” statements.
— Give helpful resources.
— Let them know you’re there.
There’s no right or wrong way to help someone seek mental health support. Their safety is the most important thing when it comes to mental health. You may have to step in to get them immediate help. But by listening to your friend and validating their experience, you can be a critical source of support to them.