How to Stay Present
Learn to ignore distractions, stay focused and deepen your relationships.
Learn to ignore distractions to deepen your relationships.
The world is filled with distractions. Surrounded by pinging cell phones and ever-present notifications, it can be hard to focus your attention on the person and conversation in front of you. Utilize these simple tips and tricks to reorient yourself and deepen your relationships in the present.
Why we're distracted
It is easy to think of distraction as a modern-day issue. But even medieval monks complained about a lack of concentration.
Neuroscientist Adam Gazzaley, M.D., Ph.D. founder and executive director of the translational neuroscience center Neuroscape and the David Dolby Distinguished Professor in neurology, physiology and psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco, divides distractions into two categories: internal and external. Internal distractions can include daydreaming or more chronic issues, like the effects of obsessive compulsive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. Examples of external distractions include conversations in a loud restaurant or persistent text message notifications.
The science of distraction
The brain is an incredible processing machine that is more powerful than most computers. Yet despite new societal expectations for constant multitasking, the brain can only focus its attention on one thing at a time. According to a report from the journal Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience, this singular focus is known as "selective" or "spotlight" attention.
Across all age brackets, those who are able to focus their attention (and ignore distractions) are better at remembering important information. Being better at suppressing irrelevant information has a direct effect on your ability to remember. By dedicating less brain power to ignoring distractions, your mind is better able to focus on remembering important information.
What to do
"We could change our behavior, or we could change our brains," Gazzaley says. There are obvious short-term fixes to the problem of divided attention. But putting your phone away, for example, may not be enough.
Meditation, a long held practice, enhances attention and can improve relationships. In a study from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, couples who practiced meditation regularly were more optimistic and reported higher relationship satisfaction.
Cultivate a mindfulness practice. Join a meditation class at a local yoga center. Utilize apps to bring guided meditation into your home. Try a walking meditation, which is the practice of meditating while engaging in a ritualized walk. By incorporating mindfulness into your everyday routine, you will have a better grasp on staying present with others in our life.
Acknowledge and focus on your breath as you read the rest of this article. Notice how your lungs expand when you take a deep breath. Let the breath out slowly and feel your body relax into the breath. Close your eyes and maintain a steady pattern of breathing.
Make mindfulness part of your regular routine. Set aside ten minutes a day for yourself in a quiet spot to begin this life-changing and brain-boosting ritual.
Summary
— Commit to a meditation practice or other type of mindfulness practice.
— Find the type of meditation that resonates with you.
— Make meditation part of your daily life to improve your relationships.
In a world full of distractions, it can be hard to focus on conversational partners. By adding mindfulness practices into your everyday life, you can improve your focus and stay present in your interactions with others.